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12.17.09

It's hard for me to write to you when I am writing for you. Its like trying to send my heart in the mail. There just isn't room.
It scares me that you can read these words right now. It scares me that you can see me being honest. I like my dishonesty. I like the picture it paints. I like how much prettier it makes me.
Well at least makes me seem.
I drew a picture of us tonight. I came out all blacked out. I couldn't help it. I can't really exist with you. Not happily anyways. Unless you give up your happiness. I don't want to be a crazy selfish bitch so I'll leave it alone.
I hope you understand. I hope you see my point. I hope that maybe we're growing apart just so we can grow back together again. I really doubt it though. I'm moving away next month. I'm starting a new life, becoming a new me. One who shines a little more brightly. It just can't work can it?