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01.11.10

It's been a long time, but I wish it had been longer. Maybe then we'd have something to say or maybe there would be nothing to say. Either way would be less painful than stumbling through the same old accusations.

You're the kinda guy who tries to talk without words. Rough sex means you're thinking of someone else. Making love is like an apology. Either way, it's never anything good.

I tried telling you why I walked out on you that night. All you said was that I was wrong. I'm always wrong in your eyes, and you're always perfectly right. People often say that you should try to see from the other person's perspective, but all you see then is another tainted window. I try to see from neither of our perspectives.

At least I can admit when I'm wrong. This is something you've never learned. I try to lead by example, but all I ever do is prove you're right yet again. You don't understand, whether from lack of intelligence or from purely being stubborn, I can't say.

I tell this to my friends and they ask me why I even bother hanging onto you. I tell them how refreshing it is to be treated like dirt when everyone else I know looks up to me. They're always searching for my approval and I'm sick of having the final say. I like how you treat me like shit, you're something to push against, and the harder I learn to push... the stronger I'll be.